Tag: depression

The Great Interrupter

I told myself earlier this month that I would write a new post about my journey to landing an opportunity of a lifetime. Weeks passed and though it never left my mind, I didn’t allow myself to slow down enough to get my thoughts together to be able to share the magnitude of what happened; especially in a year that has been nothing less than tragic. I promise that I’ll get to that story but today I had to stop everything to share the most simplest moment that happened to me just this morning.

Like many of you, I have been hit hard this week. The news of Jacob Blake… followed by the teen vigilante shooting… while watching the repeated history displayed at the March on Washington… and the looming frustration of have no arrests in the case of Breonna Taylor… and then news that Chadwick Boseman dies at age 42. THE Black Panther. Wakanda Forever. Gone. It was too much. So this morning I purposed myself to take control of the mood that I wanted to set for the day. I decided to set aside hours of no television and no social media. Instead, I would light candles, have breakfast, fold clothes and maybe I would break out one of the books I’ve been trying to read for over a year.

Continue reading “The Great Interrupter” →
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The Little Teddy Bear

Before I can fully engage you with my thoughts from the premiere episode of “The Same Room,” I  must first layout how much of a full circle moment this is for me. Six years ago I attended an event called “The Merge Summit” in Los Angeles where I was first introduced to a man name Toure’ Roberts. He was a guest speaker at one of our opening morning sessions and with every word he spoke it was like he was speaking directly into my life. From that day on I’ve been a follower of his ministry called One Church LA (now known as The Potter’s House at One LA and Denver).

Just about 4 years ago I moved to New York and became a listener of his podcast. I would listen to his sermons daily just to push me through the scariest, most uncertain time of my life. One day I selected a sermon and to my surprise it was a voice that I hadn’t heard before. It was a woman named Stephanie Ike who was a guest speaker at One Church LA. I  ALMOST immediately skipped it because she wasn’t someone I had heard of and let’s face it, she was like the substitute teacher. But then I thought that if Toure’ thought so highly of her to have her fill in for him while he was away she had to be pretty dynamic. So instead I listened intently and it wasn’t that long before I was completely drawn in. She had voice, she had a presence, and she most certainly had a Word! Continue reading “The Little Teddy Bear” →

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It’s been a tough few days for our country and for the world. I can’t ignore that fact nor can I sugarcoat it. I just have to be 100% authentic when I say that I’m at a loss to how I’m going to address it all. Emotions are high and operating out of them is never a good thing. So I sit here with the rain teetering off my window trying to figure out how to articulate all the thoughts running through my head without letting emotion take complete control so here goes…

I have to back track a bit. A few months ago, I posted a blog entry titled “Connect the Dots.” As a young girl, I realized early on that I was not skilled at drawing. I could color in the lines perfectly but when it came to creating my own perfect picture, it was a mess. I remember the joy I would get from the books that were designed for a struggling young artist like myself. It started out with a bunch of dots all over the page and no semblance of a picture but as I began to connect the dots it all started to take shape. Though it was super simple there was still an order to the thing. I could have connected the dots any way that I wanted to but the picture wouldn’t have come out right. I had to first either know how to count or how to say the alphabet in order to connect the dots properly. It required attention and a lot of concentration but not on the big picture rather on my knowledge of counting and reciting the alphabet. I did my part and the rest was already aligned to take shape! Sometimes the closest dot wasn’t the dot that I needed to connect to first. It defied what would seem logical in my eyes. If it had not been for the order lined out before me, I would have screwed it up. However, my picture had no other choice but to come out perfect as long as I focused on what I knew. If I tried to figure out the picture without factoring in the order, it would have taken me a lot longer to figure it out and I’m almost guaranteeing you it would have been distorted. Continue reading “#OverIt” →

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IN THE MIDDLE – DANCE OFF!

I’ve been so looking forward to this post! God gave me this idea on my ride to church a few weeks ago and since I write my blogs in advance, I had to wait to share. It’s so out of the box for me but I love it. Let me first let you in on a little tidbit to put everything in perspective. Last year was the MOST challenging, heart wrenching, loneliest year of my life. REAL TALK! I can admit that I was in a very dark place for months. I just wanted time to stand still to give myself time to recoup, figure things out, and just be for a minute. Life was carrying on and I was hanging on to the bumper by a string. I had some very trying days that tested my faith. I had many angry days at God. I was sad much more than I was happy. Simply put, I was just getting by. I can’t say that every day I made a decision to praise God but I know for a fact that the times that I did, even in the midst of my pain, is the reason I’m in one of the happiest places of my life this year! No, my life is not perfect. Yes, there are things that still need fixing but my perspective has changed. I have renewed hope. I have a clearer vision and most importantly I have a more intimate relationship with God BECAUSE of what I went through. Continue reading “IN THE MIDDLE – DANCE OFF!” →

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