It’s with mixed emotions that I write this celebratory post in honor of my 1 year Anniversary going “solo” as a blogger. I didn’t intend for it to cover such a heavy, controversial topic. It was supposed to be light hearted and fun… you know, something with lots of pictures to introduce the rebranding of the vision and the new layout. But after a day of going back and forth about what I wanted to do verses what needed to be done, I settled myself in the fact that this blog is a reflection of what’s important to me and that’s being a voice and a light to those who I’m called to serve. Although I welcome EVERYONE to visit, comment, follow, and share… this blog targets women. Young women. So how could I, with good conscience, ignore a story that has been highly oversaturating the news front since yesterday morning? Interesting enough it’s been with very little attention on the victim of the incident. I’m speaking about Janay Rice. Yes, she has a name. It’s not on the back of a football jersey. It’s not the most recognizable but it’s a name that matters. This is my take on the situation and it may not be the most popular but I’ve never really cared about popular opinion so here goes… Continue reading “MRS. RICE”
MAN CRUSH MOMENT (MCM)
In the midst of one of my worst weeks ever, God showed me that He was still moving on my behalf and that my purpose was not going to be sidetracked by my pain. After a few months of talks with the founder of Defined By Christ magazine, I got the email that I’d been waiting on. My first relationship article would be published the following morning! You have to understand that I was in a slump! Nothing was going right and I honestly had forgotten about all that was in the works… until that email. The connection began after posting my most viewed blog post ever titled “Wifey” a few months back. I received emails from all types of people and I was offered many opportunities. The offer from DBC magazine was one of the ones I took seriously and it has come to fruition!
Last week I posted the link to the article to my social media accounts but I wanted to make sure my loyal readers, who may not be connected to me outside of the blog, had a chance to read it. I’m humbled by opportunities that have presented themselves to me and the divine connections that I’ve made over the past few months. I don’t take this assignment lightly and I look forward to seeing what’s next! Until then, I’ll get settled in to my new role as a relationship columnist for DBC magazine!! Hope you enjoy the read…
Wifey
There will be days when I’m more unapologetic for my viewpoints than others… today would be that day! I just might piss a few people off. Me saying “piss” may have already done the trick but hey… can’t please everyone. So…. The news about Dwyane Wade’s and Ludacris’ new baby mama drama has me on fire! And probably not for the reason you’re expecting to hear. Yes, it’s foul to be in a relationship with a woman for YEARS and father a child by another woman. In most cases I would call the other women “randoms” but I’m not certain that would apply in this case given the information that both women were from the men’s past; as far back as high school for Ludacris. Yes, it’s unfortunate that beautiful women in the spotlight give such a bad name to women in general when they decide to stick it out with men who would devalue them that much. But what’s even more disgusting is the fact that there’s any amount of sympathy for their “main chicks.” I mean let’s be real, what makes Gabrielle Union and Eudoxie any better than the “baby mamas.” Yeah I said it, and here’s why… Continue reading “Wifey”
Be a Gift, Not a Prize
So I got mad the other day. The kind of mad that makes your knee bounce up and down because for some reason that seems to help you control your tongue… or is that just me? Regardless, just know that I was ready to pounce. If there’s one thing that can get me going is to see any one of my friends hurt. Well this particular night, I was hearing a dear friend of mine recant the day her heart was broken. No this wasn’t years ago, it was just a few days past. So because I have been on the recipient end of heartbreak a few times myself, I knew all too well what kind of pain she was in. This kind of pain doesn’t subside with a bottle of Advil. You can’t just say, “Take two and call me in the morning.”
Instead, I encouraged her to not blame herself… to see the guy for who he really is and not who she wants him to be. I encouraged her to be true to her feelings and not to feel guilty about being angry and expressing that anger responsibly. I told her she was worth more than what she was given and that a guy that truly cared about her as a friend would have never treated her that way. All of those things were true to my heart but it wasn’t until I was driving home that God gave me the true revelation of what many women have failed to grasp. I heard, “Don’t treat yourself like a prize when you are a gift.” Continue reading “Be a Gift, Not a Prize”
I Don’t Do Knockoffs
Jeremiah 17:9-10
“The heart is hopelessly dark and deceitful,
a puzzle that no one can figure out.
But I, God, search the heart
and examine the mind.
I get to the heart of the human.
I get to the root of things.
I treat them as they really are,
not as they pretend to be.”
So many times you hear people say “Follow your heart.” If only we followed the voice of God and got into His Word, we would save ourselves from a lot of unnecessary troubles. Sometimes we need to be saved from ourselves… saved from our own thoughts, our inner demons, and our own understanding. That’s where I am and though it’s not an easy thing to go through, it’s necessary to get to God’s expected end. Continue reading “I Don’t Do Knockoffs”
a league of my own
Before I get started, let me just say that I’ve been a bit off track these past few weeks. I wasn’t in the Word and I wasn’t making a lot of time to hear from God. I have had soooo much on my plate that I must admit, God and this blog took a backseat. I told you all from the beginning that I won’t be anything but real with you and the real deal is that I don’t always make the wisest decisions. As a result, I’m off schedule with my posts and because I didn’t properly manage my time this week, I’m not prepared to share my journal entry even today.
Key Note: The decisions you make today will affect your tomorrow and beyond.
None-the-less, I’m determined not to be disheveled or discouraged by my mishaps. Today is a new day with brand new mercies and I’m going to keep it moving. I’ll get back to my journal entries but for today I’m going to share what God shared with me on my ride to work today. It’s random but it’s God so it’s worth sharing. Continue reading “a league of my own”
Define What YOU Want!
It’s often so easy for us to say we want a better paying job, a husband, a wife, our own business, etc but how often do we set aside time to clearly define those things. As usual, I’ll use myself as an example. Since I began my career, I knew I wanted to be a TV producer. I’ve always been a visual person with tons of creative ideas and opinions on what I would love to see on screen. I jumped into my career the first chance I got and went with the flow. I wasn’t quite in the position I dreamed of but I was happy to be in my field and getting paid decent for it. The years passed and I couldn’t understand why I wasn’t progressing in the areas I wanted to be. Each day became more difficult and I couldn’t see an end to the tunnel. It wasn’t until I heard the words of a man who has made such an extraordinary impact on my life that I was able to see passed the situation. My pastor once said, “The power to define is the power to fulfill. You can’t fulfill what you are unable to define.” Continue reading “Define What YOU Want!”
KNOW YOUR WORTH
One of the reasons I enjoy sharing with you all every week is because I never feel pressure to act like I have all the answers. I probably have more questions than anything and each day I learn something new about myself. The best teachers are the random people that I interact with on a weekly basis. This week in particular it seemed that everyone wanted to know the same thing… “Why aren’t you married yet?” The guy at church, an old high school classmate, and a childhood friend to name a few and they all gave me that look to say, “What’s wrong with you?” I swore if one more person grabbed my ring finger looking for a rock I thought I would scream! I wanted to yell, “I’M GOOD!!” Instead, I politely smiled and said, “Not yet.” Trust me, no one is more excited to meet the future Mr. Ashton (lol, j/k) than me but I’m trying to enjoy the season I’m in now! And that is where many of us, especially women, miss it! When I meet him trust me the world will know! Continue reading “KNOW YOUR WORTH”
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